


Forbidden Volume 3

by jade_lil



Series: Forbidden [3]
Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-27
Updated: 2017-05-27
Packaged: 2018-11-05 12:12:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 14
Words: 13,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11013192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jade_lil/pseuds/jade_lil
Summary: It was wrong to want each other so much but that didn't stop them.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Last Volume of this dirty, dirty series XD

It was half past five and he was rushing to get to the train station when a man came up to him.   
  
“You’re Ohno Satoshi, right?” the man asked. He blinked and blinked again, trying to place the man’s face because he was pretty sure he saw this man before, he just couldn’t remember it.    
  
At least until the memory of that one time he saw this man’s retreating back as he was being lead outside the door of their apartment by his brother hit him. His anger was so sudden he had to literally breathe a couple of times to calm himself down, but along with the anger was also fear.   
  
Afterall, he was certain that this was the same man his brother had sucked off if only to keep him from talking, was the same man who was well aware about him and his brother, so he had to be extra careful. He was also sure that this man didn’t just come on to him randomly.   
  
“Who’s asking?” he bit back, trying to cover his nervousness with anger.    
  
“Sakurai Sho,” the man said, the pitch of his voice barely changing. “We haven’t met but I know your brother,”   
  
“And?”   
  
The man didn’t even blink. “I need to talk to you about something,”   
  
“I don’t think so –“   
  
“I’m not here to negotiate, Ohno-kun,” the man literally growled that he was honestly caught off-guard. “Now come with me so we can talk, in private. Let’s not make a scene here, that’s the last thing we need right now,”   
  
“But but –“   
  
“I have your brother, Ohno-kun,” the man hissed under his breath and if it wasn’t enough to turn his blood into ice, he didn’t know what else would. “Now being the good brother that you always are, you will come with me quietly and willingly, understood?”   
  
His heart was beating so fast he wondered how he was still standing upright; he’s terrified for his brother but he shouldn’t let it cloud his judgment. He kept still and met the man’s gaze squarely.   
  
“How do I know you’re telling the truth?” he hissed back, “As far as I know, my brother is still in school and I’m just heading there to pick him –“   
  
The man whipped out his phone before he could even finish, pressed the call button and slapped the phone to his ear.    
  
“I left him in my apartment, tied into a chair with only his left arm free to hold and answer the phone,” the man said by way of explanation, waiting for the call to connect. He was immediately scrambling for his phone to check if there were any incoming messages or miscalls from his brother but the man was speaking again before he could do that.    
  
“Oh, and he will not call you or message you because I specifically told him not to, that if he do that, I’ll kill you first,” the man said before he held out the phone. “He’s on, you can talk to him,”   
  
His fingers were shaking when he took the phone from the man’s hand, slapping it against his ear.   
  
“H-Hello?”   
  
“N-Ni-chan, is that you?! Are you alright? That bastard didn’t hurt you, did he? Oh my god, why aren’t you talking, Ni-chan?! Oh shit, Ni-chan, please talk to me, please tell me that bastard –“   
  
“I’m… I’m okay, Kazu,” he breathed, partly relieved to hear that his brother was fine. “I – what about you?”   
  
“I’m tied into a fucking chair!” his brother yelled, then, “that bastard is sick, Ni-chan! Don’t let him talk you into doing anything you don’t like, okay and just, I don’t know, call your friends or the police or –“   
  
“That’s enough,” the man said, snatching the phone out of his hand. “Now do you believe me or not?”   
  
He was so angry that he could feel it seeping through his skin, and the need to beat the living crap out of the man was too strong he had to literally dig his fingernails tightly into his skin to keep himself from doing that. Because right now, the important thing was to make sure his brother was safe and he wouldn’t be able to do that if he didn’t know where Kazu was or where this bastard hid his brother.   
  
“I do,” he muttered through tightly gritted teeth, “now what the fuck do you want me to do for you to release my brother?” he asked.   
  
The man grinned for the first time, pocketing his phone before jerking a thumb to the opposite direction. “I want you to come with me and we will talk about it there,”   
  
“Talk about what?”   
  
“What you have to do to convince me,” the man answered before he started walking away.


	2. Chapter 2

  
His fingers itched to take his phone out of his pocket but he held himself. For now, he had to remain calm, follow this man to wherever the hell they were headed to and find out where the bastard was hiding his brother.   
  
They took the elevator up to the seventh floor as he kept his distance from the man just to be safe. He still wasn’t sure what the man was up to, but judging with the way the man was sweeping him over with hungry glances, it wasn’t that hard to figure out.   
  
The man led him out of the elevator without a word, just tilted his head to the right before he walked on. Ohno followed quietly, fingers itching to take his phone out again but reminded himself to be patient. Afterall, he had managed to send a quick text to Machin, telling his bestfriend to track him and his brother via his phone if he hadn’t contact him after an hour.   
  
The man stopped in front of apartment door 712. “We’re here,” he said; Ohno remained quiet and simply watched the man retrieve his keys from his pants’ pocket and used it to open the door.   
  
He was seconds away from bashing the man’s head against the nearest wall and it was only the fact that he still wasn’t sure if his brother was really inside the goddamn place that was stopping him from doing exactly that.   
  
He didn’t even wait for the man to invite him in. He just shove his way inside, heart in his throat as he let his eyes wander around the semi-darkened place, his gaze immediately zooming in into his brother’s familiar skinny form tied into a chair in the middle of the goddamn living room.   
  
“Kazu!” he cried and was immediately by his brother’s side in three huge strides.   
  
+++   
  
It was his brother’s hands on his face and his brother’s voice calling out to him that had woke him up from his unexpected nap.   
  
When he opened his eyes, his brother’s face was so close, his expression worried. He immediately felt relieved despite finding out that he was still tied into the fucking chair. Lips quivering and eyes misty with renewed tears, he found himself murmuring, “Ni-chan, you’re here,”   
  
“H-Hey,” his brother’s hands were warm and his breathe warmer where it was hitting the side of his face. He closed his eyes and leaned back to the touch, only to pop them open again the minute he remember why in hell they were here.   
  
“Ni-chan, what the hell did that bastard do to you?!” he half-yelled, clutching his brother’s shoulder with his only free arm. “What did he –“   
  
“Nothing yet,” his Coach grumbled from somewhere and his brother’s hold around him tightened marginally, protectively shielding him at the same time his brother turned to glare at his Coach.    
  
“I don’t know what the fuck’s crawled up your ass but you will let us leave right this minute or I swear to god, I am going to make sure you’ll rot in jail for this,” his brother gritted.   
  
His coach’s stance didn’t even waver. In fact, he simply smiled and raised his hand, holding something that looked suspiciously like a gun and pointing it at them.   
  
“Oh, I’m scared,” his Coach said confidently, taking slow steps towards them; he was shaking something bad and he was sure it wasn’t just him, his brother was, too. “Quit the brave act because you’re not fooling me, Ohno-kun,” his Coach said, nodding at them both.   
  
“Coach, please, what is it do you want from us?” he was crying now, afraid for himself and for his brother. It didn’t help that his Coach looked a lot like some crazy dude who had just managed to escape a fucking nut house.   
  
His Coach grinned like a fucking lunatic and stepped forward, closer and closer still.   
  
“Twice I saw you fuck each other’s brains out and twice I found myself jerking off while watching you,” his Coach confessed, and he was honestly shaking to the core before he realizes it.    
  
“What the fuck –“ his brother cursed but was stopped mid-way when his Coach aimed the gun right into his brother’s face.    
  
“No, Coach, please!” he cried, tugging his brother roughly into him, hiding his brother’s face into his neck. “W-What do you want? J-Just tell us what you want and we’ll do it… j-just.. just promise you’ll let us go after, unharmed, please?”   
  
“Kazu!” his brother hissed but he managed to stop whatever it was his brother was planning on saying by shaking his head repeatedly.   
  
His Coach grinned again, spying the way the older man reached down to cup himself through his pants.   
  
“What I want?” his Coach said, grinning manically, “is to see you fuck each other up close – to see the faces you’ll make when your brother’s cock is inside you, the noises you make when you’re both so close to coming, right here, right now. That’s what I want,”   
  
His brother uttered another curse which he answered by digging his fingernails into the skin of his brother’s arms.   
  
He didn’t even need to see his brother’s face to know that he was seething with rage.   
  
He closed his eyes and pressed his mouth against the side of his brother’s neck.   
  
“Then you  better untie me now so I can perform well, Coach,”


	3. Chapter 3

His fingers were shaking continuously as he untied the rope restraining his brother against the chair. Somewhere behind them, his brother’s coach stood by, watching them.  
  
Kazu’s hand found his face, felt Kazu’s thumb swiping tenderly across his cheek. He wanted to cry but he didn’t want to do that in front of his brother, knowing how this was already scaring his brother enough. He wanted to at least show his brother that he could count on him, that despite the fucked up situation they’re currently in, he didn’t have any plans on leaving his brother alone.  
  
They’re in this together, just like always.  
  
“Can you do it, Ni-chan?” his  brother whispered at the same time the last of the rope gave out and his brother was finally free. “I – this is all my fault, I’m sorry,”  
  
He shook his head and cupped his brother’s face, pressing a kiss against his brother’s temple. Now, more than ever, he need to reassure his brother that nothing about this was his fault since it had been his from the very beginning. Ever since that night he came back from being away from home for so long and his brother had slipped into bed with him to cuddle, the night he kissed his brother for the first time.  
  
“I’d do anything to make sure you’re going to walk out of here safe and unharmed,” he said, wishing his voice sounded more confident, “even if it meant killing someone with my own bare hands,”  
  
His brother was openly crying now, and he had to pull him into his arms, couldn’t not, if only to hush him, crushing his brother into a hug so tight before he let him go.   
  
“You don’t need to do that, though,” his brother reminded him, voice shaking still, “just… he wants us to fuck so let’s fuck,” his brother said and this time he sounded determined, at the very least. “Just don’t think about him while we’re at it and maybe he’ll let us go once he’s satisfied,”  
  
He bristled; well, he doubted that but there was no way he would say it in front of his brother. The man had a gun and it was evident in the way the man stared at them that the few remaining working screws in the coach’s head had snapped, and that he obviously didn’t care about anything at all. The man was crazy, that much was obvious.  
  
Either way, he had to point out something even if it meant taking a bullet in the head for it, had to say it now to avoid letting the coach get the wrong idea about this whole ‘I want to watch you fuck each other like rabbits’ thing.  
  
He stood up, taking his brother with him, arm branded around his brother’s waist as he faced their captor. He let his hand travel from the small of his brother’s back to his brother’s behind, cupping his brother’s ass possessively and ignoring his brother’s surprised yelp without taking his gaze away from the coach.  
  
“Just to remind you, Coach,” he said, pulling his brother into him and using his other free hand to palm his cock through his jeans before using the same hand to touch his brother’s dick through his own. “My brother is mine and mine alone… his cock, his ass, his everything – he belongs to me only so don’t get the wrong idea, because I’m not going to allow you to lay a finger on him, much more fuck him while I’m still breathing. He’s mine and you only get to watch me as I fuck him and that’s it. You can’t even touch him because the moment that you do, I’m going to fucking kill you,” he said evenly, meeting the coach’s gaze as he kept his brother close.  
  
Coach Sakurai cocked his head and licked his lips.  
  
“Possessive, aren’t we?” he commented, and he swore he felt the shudder rocking his brother’s spine even before the coach opened his mouth to say,  
  
“Don’t worry,” he said and paused, his eyes twinkling in manic glee. “I have no intention of fucking either of you and besides,” another pause, “I’ve sucked your brother off before I went out to find you, so I think your warning came a bit too late, I apologize,”  
  
He seethed. “You fucking bastard – !”


	4. Chapter 4

“Ni-chan, no, please!” he cried, throwing himself in front of his brother before his brother even managed to take one step towards his coach. His coach cocked the gun and the sound alone was enough to put him to action, not bothering looking back to check as he wrapped his arms around his brother’s waist, burying his face against his brother’s chest.   
  
“What the fuck did you do?!” his brother half-yelled, seething with rage, directing his questions to his Coach who remained quietly still; at least he hoped his Coach wasn’t moving because judging with how angry his brother was, he wasn’t sure what the fuck’s going to happen here, now. “I’m fucking asking you –“   
  
“Ni-chan, Ni-chan,” he called, reaching up to finger the side of his brother’s face, tender and coaxing, tugging his brother’s face down for a kiss. His brother was shaking, wriggling out of his hold but he was not going to let him go, not now. “Listen to me, Ni-chan, please, come on, look at me,” he begged, leaning up to press his mouth against his brother’s own.    
  
“Kazu, Kazu,” his brother groaned, miserable, his anger palpable; his brother’s hand cupped his face as he allowed himself to be kissed, his lips quivering against Kazu’s own. “What did he do? Tell me, tell me, Kazu,”   
  
“Nothing you should be upset about, I promise,” he breathed back, “he didn’t fuck me, he didn’t, Ni-chan, I swear,”   
  
“I didn’t,” the coach hummed from where he was and Kazu had to shift a little to see him, just so he’d know what to expect. The older man was waving the gun like a crazy person and grinning like one, too. “I sucked his dick and made sure he enjoyed every minute of it, sucked him until he was coming in my mouth with a shout,”   
  
“I’m going to fucking kill you!” his brother screamed, and he had to do what he could to keep his brother from advancing, tugging his brother roughly by the back of his head for a kiss, shoving his tongue inside his brother’s mouth.   
  
“I’m going –“ his brother screamed still, and he swallowed his words eagerly, sucking on his brother’s tongue without letting him go.    
  
“Ni-chan, please!”   
  
His coach cocked the gun again. “Listen to your brother, Ohno-kun,” the man warned, “Now be a good boy and get naked because we don’t have much time for all these dramas. I told you I only want to watch you fuck and I’m a man of my words. I’ll let you go as soon as you’re done, so,” the man paused here, finding the nearby chair and flopping down onto it.   
  
“Start fucking,” the man said, gesturing to them with his fingers.


	5. Chapter 5

He was well on his way towards his brother’s coach despite his brother hanging onto him for dear life, shaking his brother off of him when he paused, gaze zooming in to the older man’s hands gripping the gun – his trembling hands, as was the rest of him was.   
  
It took him a few more seconds to stare, the reality sinking in slower than it probably should have but he’d never been a smart guy to begin with (not like his brother) so he didn’t let it bother him and instead, he kept staring.   
  
He could vaguely feel his brother’s fingers slipping from where they were previously gripping his forearms down to his hips, could feel his brother’s mouth – wet and hot and eager – as his brother peppered open-mouthed kisses from his clavicle to his chest. Somehow, in between his sudden interest at his brother’s coach’s trembling hands and his brain’s attempt at cataloguing every detail his eyes were seeing, his brother had managed to push his shirt up his armpits, had managed to wriggle himself in front of him before mashing his face against his chest.   
  
“Ni-chan… Ni-chan…” his brother kept murmuring in that shaky voice of his, fingers cold in contrast to the warmness of his own skin; he gasped at the feel of his brother’s tongue flicking over one of his nipples and then gasped again when his brother repeated the action. “You heard him, right? You heard what he said,” his brother insisted, hand moving down to cup him again through his pants, and the action itself was enough to tear his attention from his brother’s coach’s face. “He wants to see… he just wants to see, so let’s –“   
  
His hips rolled back as if on autopilot, gaze still burning a hole into the older man’s face as his brother slipped his fingers onto the waistband of his jeans to touch him properly. He groaned, and it was a testament as to how his body always reacted to his brother’s touches that not even the fact that they were in danger of being murdered was enough to keep his dick from going hard once his brother’s fingers are around him.   
  
A moan tore itself from the back of his throat again at the feel of his brother’s fingertip dragging itself across the slit of his dick, shivering at the immediate punch of sensation singing through his veins.   
  
Across them, his brother’s coach face was masked with something akin to fascination, lust and something else, and with that, he could also very well spy the way the coach’s knees trembled as he held on to the back of the chair he was previously seated at to probably steady himself.   
  
Their eyes meet and something in the older man’s eyes glistened, and for the life of him, he wondered what it was he saw in there that made something in his chest tight, his heartbeat slowed down drastically as his anger drained out of him in gradual degrees before he even realized it.   
  
It must be the way the coach stared at them with something akin to jealousy that was carefully hidden beneath an obviously forced smirk, or the way he stared at them hungrily despite the way he was trying to keep it hidden away.   
  
Looking at him now, he wondered if this wouldn’t have happened if it wasn’t for him and his brother, if they had been careful enough for this poor man, or anyone for that matter, to catch them fucking each other’s brains out. He realized with a start that this was all his and his brother’s fault.   
  
He caught the back of his  brother’s neck with one hand as his brother was busy sucking the life out of his nipples, moved his other hand down the small of his brother’s back before to steady him when he pulled his brother’s face up for a kiss.   
  
“He just wants a show, huh?” he murmured, still mostly against his brother’s lips, basking on the joy of seeing his brother’s eyes, dark and wild, as they stared into his own. He sampled a glance to where the older man had flopped himself back down on the chair, eyes glued on the  both of them.   
  
His brother hummed in response, seeking his mouth again. He gave in and sucked on his brother’s tongue, pulled back just far enough to murmur, “Then let’s give him a show he wouldn’t be able to fucking forget,”


	6. Chapter 6

His brother moaned something that sounded like a broken version of his name when he pulled his mouth away only to attach it against his brother’s jaw, one hand he kept round the back of his brother’s neck while the other he moved down to cup his brother’s balls, one after the other. Then his fingers worked their way up, feeling the hardness of his brother’s cock, fingertips gracing the bulging veins around the hardened length.    
  
A soft, almost pleased smile graced his lips when his thumb found the head of his brother’s dick – already slippery and wet with precum – knowing that despite the very unfortunate situation they were currently in, he could still make his brother go hard as a rock in seconds, the way he was, too, inside his pants.    
  
But it was difficult not to give in to their bodies’ needs when it was obvious that they were moving on pure instinct now. It didn’t even matter that they had a one-man audience not even a few feet away from them, because when his brother moaned his name at one particularly hard squeeze of his hand around his brother’s dick, his own cock twitched in response as if it knew it was a call that neither he nor his cock was strong enough to resist.   
  
“Let me suck you first, Nichan,” his brother hummed into his neck, fingers already poised in between his legs, over the button of his pants, all ready to relieve him off of it. He dug his fingers against his brother’s hips and soothed the sting with gentle strokes when his brother hissed in surprised pain, tilting his brother’s face up for a kiss.   
  
“Just take me out,” he instructed just as he pushed his brother on his knees without preamble, his brother immediately working on unzipping his pants and slipping his small fingers inside the waistband of his boxers to take him out gingerly. He gasped the minute his brother’s fingers made in contact with skin, then gasped again when his brother didn’t even bother with the niceties and just leaned over to suck him in in one go.   
  
He was fucking his brother’s mouth within seconds, fingers tight against his brother’s hair and his eyes locked on Coach Sakurai’s face as he rolled his hips slowly, feeling his cock slipping all the way to the back of his brother’s throat. It was so good, so damn perfect, and he told his brother as much.   
  
His brother smiled in return and just part his mouth wide open so he could slip his cock in and out easily, his dick wet with his brother’s spit and the evidence of his own arousal.    
  
“That’s enough,” he told his brother, taking his brother’s attention away from licking and licking the now too sensitive head of his dick; he had to stop his brother or else he’d come in a second and he was pretty sure the coach wouldn’t like it.    
  
He pulled his brother by his forearms and tugged him up, their mouths meeting in the middle for a kiss. He moaned at the taste of himself on his brother’s tongue, moaned again when his brother’s hand found his cock and squeezed.   
  
When they pull apart, he reached up to stroke his brother’s cheek, soft and tender, and murmured, “We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to,” he said, just to make sure, though with the way his brother was rolling his hips unto him, obviously seeking friction, it was not hard to tell that his brother wanted this just as badly.    
  
“I’ll always want you, Ni-chan,” his brother moaned and he ducked down to  kiss him again, he had to, couldn’t not, because it was the same temptation he had long given up trying to resist, slipping his tongue into the heat of his brother’s mouth to chase away the remnants of his own arousal.   
  
“I love you,” he murmured when they part, pressing another soft kiss against the corner of his brother’s mouth before he turned him around. With his lips still pressed against the lobe of his brother’s ear, he reached around to wrap his brother’s dick in his hand, swiping a thumb across the weeping slit.    
  
“Ni-chan –“   
  
With a practiced roll his hips, he managed to aim the blunt head of his cock against his brother’s already twitching hole, bending his knees a little as he mouthed something against the nape of his brother’s neck.    
  
“This will hurt a little, Kazu,” he whispered, raggedly, all the while watching his brother’s coach, with his eyes wide open and fingers poised on his lap, palm in mid-roll.   
  
His brother threw his head back and moaned. “Do it,”   
  
He didn’t need to be told twice as he jerked his hips, his cock slipping all the way inside the perfect warmth that was his brother’s ass.


	7. Chapter 7

  
“Shit,”    
  
He heard the man’s groans before he even saw him, opening his eyes to the sounds of his brother’s enraged growls from behind. His fingers tightened absently around his brother’s wrists that were gripping his hips, clenching his muscles around his brother’s cock to distract him.   
  
“Forget him,” he pleaded under his breath, rolling his hips back onto his brother’s own with a hissing moan. “Just close your eyes and pretend he’s not here, Ni-chan, please?” he said, watching his coach took two more steps forward to close the distance, the gun still in his hand and aimed at them, while the other he had around his cock, touching himself.   
  
“I’m going to kill him,” his brother hissed from behind, hips jerking fast into him he was seeing stars.    
  
“I’m the one with the gun here,” his coach murmured, mouth tilted into an amused grin. By now, the older man close enough he could vaguely hear his ragged breathes, could see the way the gun was shaking around the older man’s grip.    
  
“Then do it and shoot me if you really can,” his brother shot back at the same time his brother’s hips jerked into him so hard he was whimpering before he could even stop himself. “but you can’t, can you? I’m sure you would have done so already if you were really planning on killing us both. But you’re not. You want something else from us and you’re using that gun to scare us, make us do what you want but I’m telling you, you won’t get it. Not until I am alive and breathing,”   
  
The older man raised one brow at that and his brother stilled behind him.    
  
“So, which is it?” his brother grunted, prompting his coach who remained strangely quiet while he was caught between wanting to pledge his brother to continue what he was doing and knowing what the hell was happening. “You know there’s another way to do this without the unnecessary drama,” his brother said, more like purred and he realized he was gripping his brother’s forearms like a lifeline.   
  
“What are you talking about?” his coach said, his eyes unfocused.    
  
“Drop the gun and let’s talk about what you want,” his brother said, sounding positively confident and less pissed than he was minutes before. “because I’m pretty certain you are after something. Not only to see us fuck our brains out, so let’s hear it,” he squirmed, uneasy, and his brother leaned forward to drop a soothing kiss against his shoulder.   
  
A beat that became two and he watched as his coach lowered his hand gripping the gun.   
  
“I –“   
  
“Ni-chan, what –“   
  
“Shhh,”   
  
“Let me make it easier for you then,” his brother cut in, “You want my brother sucking you while I’m fucking him, it’s fine; I’ll allow it,” his brother said, voice tight, and his own grip tightening around his brother’s arms absently. “that’s nothing new, afterall. He already did that before and well, I can’t really blame you for wanting to experience it again. It’s addicting, it honestly is and I won’t deny that. But that’s just it. He’ll put your dick in his mouth, pleasure you, but you won’t even get to touch him; you will keep your hands to yourself while he sucks your cock, and that’s it,”   
  
He swallowed hard, his own cock hard and throbbing in between his legs at the lewd suggestion but he could already see his coach’s Adams apple bobbed in his throat, could already see the way his coach’s eyes turned a few shades darker with desire.    
  
“You will allow that?”   
  
His brother’s cock throbbed inside him and he knew then that the suggestion itself was also turning his brother on.    
  
“I will,” his brother answered, “but with the condition that it’s going to be the last time. You will never bother us again or I swear I don’t care if you go around telling people about us. Because you are not going to win, Coach. Between you and us, who do you think the authorities will believe if I went to them and told them you held us against our will and raped us? I can do that. I can ruin your life by doing that so it’s your choice. Accept my offer and let’s part ways happy, or you can insist with your plans and have your life thrown into the garbage the moment we got out from here,”   
  
Another charged silence had passed before his coach answered, “Fine,” voice thick and low.   
  
His brother jerked his hips yet again, his cock hitting that spot inside him that had him shaking and shuddering within seconds, his brother’s mouth against his ear as he whispered,    
  
“Your fantasy, little brother,” his brother whispered, tugging one of his hands from gripping his brother’s arm, “I made it come true for you,” his brother hissed just as his coach took that one deciding step forward as his brother guided him to brace himself on the chair there.    
  
“Go knock yourself out, Kazu,” his brother commanded and he whimpered, parting his mouth eagerly as his coach offered his cock with a groan.


	8. Chapter 8

They hadn’t even properly locked the door behind them and he was already pushing his brother on his knees with one hand and the other was already unzipping his pants and pulling his cock out in one swift motion.   
  
Kazu didn’t even bat an eyelid and simply went to kneel in front of him, in between his legs, fingers gripping his ankles and looking honestly eager despite his obvious confusion. He also had his mouth already parted open, breath coming in ragged puffs the moment he aimed the head of his already hard cock against his brother’s lips.   
  
“Suck me, Kazu,” he commanded, harshly, fingers tightening against his brother’s hair as Kazu dutifully did so, sucking him in in one go. His head reared back in response at the sharp sensation punching through him, closing his eyes and trying his hardest to erase the memory of his brother sucking another man’s cock.   
  
“Yeah, like that,” he hissed; Kazu swallowed around him and he muttered a series of expletive, hips stuttering and groaning in his attempt to keep himself from outright fucking his brother’s mouth with abandon. “Ah, fuck, you’re so fucking good at this,” he mumbled, swiping the sweat off his brother’s temple as Kazu pulled back just the tiniest bit to tongue at his dripping slit.   
  
Then Kazu pulled completely away and he watched, groaning deeply, as his cock bounced out of his brother’s mouth with an obscene little pop.    
  
“Am I being punished, Ni-chan?” Kazu whispered, nuzzling the base of his cock with his eyes half-closed. “because I sucked Coach’s cock when I knew I shouldn’t?”   
  
His throat felt like it was being squeezed hard with a pair of invisible fists as he struggled to grab his brother by his shoulders and pulling him up till they’re nose to nose, shaking his head as he did so.    
  
“No, no,” he said, mostly against his brother’s mouth before he dived in for a kiss, tasting himself on his brother’s tongue as his  brother automatically opened his mouth to let him in. “of course not, Kazu,” he added, pressing two tiny kisses against the side of Kazu’s mouth as he held his brother tight.   
  
“You should, though,” his brother mumbled into his neck and his arms tightened almost as if on autopilot around his brother’s body. “I shouldn’t enjoy it but I did,” Kazu explained in a shaky voice, “because I promised you, Ni-chan, but –“   
  
“Shhh,” he hushed, hand worming around the back of his brother’s neck and tilting his head up for a kiss. “I don’t blame you, I swear I don’t,” he said, meaning it, kissing his brother again if only to reassure him.    
  
“But –“   
  
“Remember that one time we did it with your friend Jun?” he explained, not really sure if it was right to compare that one time he had consented for them to fuck another person, despite the fact that what happened with them and his brother’s coach a couple of hours before was a completely different story altogether.    
  
“That was –“   
  
“Different, I know,” he cut in, cupping his brother’s chin and kissing him again. “but let’s think of it as the same, okay?” he said, “I – or we can just forget all about it. Either way, it’s a done thing and I honestly don’t want to remember it anymore, that’s why –“   
  
“Oh –“   
  
He pushed his brother on his knees once again, but not after kissing him thoroughly, his brother willingly going down and eagerly parting his mouth to let his cock in.    
  
“Make me forget, Kazu,” he asked, softly, guiding his cock into his brother’s waiting mouth. “Make me forget the sight of your pretty mouth wrapped around another’s guy’s cock, please,”   
  
“Ni-chan –“   
  
“Suck me,” he hissed, even though his brother was doing so already, bobbing his head up and down his throbbing length. “Make me come and swallow everything. I want you only to remember the feel of my cock inside your mouth, the taste of my come beneath your tongue. Suck me, ahhh – Kazu –“


	9. Chapter 9

The noises that escaped the back of his brother’s throat was what prompted him to part his mouth wide enough to let his brother’s cock in, tonguing at the slit and moaning at the taste of his brother’s arousal lingering strong in his mouth. He groaned, fingers automatically moving to grip his brother’s legs for dear life, breathing through his nose as his brother’s own fingers moved to grab at his hair.   
  
“Ah – _yes_ ,” his brother hissed, hips stuttering in his obvious attempt to keep himself from outright fucking his mouth while he moaned around his mouthful, closed his eyes and tilted his head to the side to allow his brother’s cock to slip all the way to the back of his throat. “ _Fuck_ , yes –“    
  
He hummed encouragingly, groaning at the feel of his brother’s hands on his face, cradling his head gently to keep him in place, his chest tight and the muscles in his stomach tighter knowing what would come next.    
  
“Ah, god, I’m going to fuck your mouth so hard, little brother,” his brother grunted and Kazu hummed his agreement, his own dick going hard inside his own pants. He wanted to touch himself but doing so would require moving, of letting his hands drift away from his brother and right now, that’s the last thing he wanted. He wanted to be there with his brother all the way, wanted to make sure his brother knew he was doing this for him and for him alone. “gonna fuck you so hard you’d, _ah_ , damn it!”   
  
“Christ, you have the greediest mouth,” his brother said in between stuttered gasps, fingers tightening their grip on his hair. “I love fucking you like this – like you couldn’t fucking get enough of my cock, ah _shit_!”   
  
He groaned in response, spurred on with the way his brother talked dirty to him the way he usually wouldn’t. But he guessed he could understand why his brother was doing it, for he also didn’t want to remember the way his coach’s cock felt inside his mouth when he sucked him, the way he had his eyes closed the entire time his cock fucked his mouth as if he had all the right to.   
  
“Fuckin’ _close_ – ah, Christ –“ his brother groaned, hips  bucking into him faster but still not fast enough to hurt him, parting his mouth wider to let his brother’s cock slide in and out easily. He could hear his brother’s labored breathing despite the noises his own heart was making, despite the thundering of his blood through his ears and he swore he would never let what happened earlier happen again.    
  
“Ah, Kazu, fuck –“ his brother gritted, hips jerking in an almost frenzied rhthym it left him panting for breath, moaning around his brother’s cock as it pulsed and throbbed in his mouth, his brother’s fingers moving to grab the back of his neck as his mouth was flooded with the familiar, bitter-salty taste of his brother’s pleasure when he came.   
  
  
  
+   
  
  
The next time he blinked, he was up on his feet and his brother’s tongue shoved in his mouth, moaning low and deep as his brother sucked on his tongue, probably tasting himself as he did so. When his brother pulled back and away, his brother’s hands are once again cradling the sides of his face, his eyes still a several shades darker despite his earlier orgasm.   
  
“N-Ni-chan –“ he said, or at least started to but his brother’s lips was there again to swallow the words he was about to say next. He was gripping the front of his brother’s shirt when his brother branded his arm around him, pulling him in almost roughly, their tongues tangling together into a hard, demanding kiss.   
  
“You’re mine,” his brother hissed before Kazu realized the ground had disappeared beneath his feet.  His brother’s arms caught him around the waist, hitching him up, his legs wrapping around his brother’s waist, his arms around his  brother’s neck. “no one’s going to take you away from me, Kazu; I won’t allow it, never,” his brother followed as he ducked down to kiss his brother, conveying his agreement by kissing his brother hard in the mouth.   
  
“I’m yours,” he breathed, touching his brother’s face tenderly, kissing the tips of his nose, his eyes, the corners of his mouth. “always. No one’s going to take me away from you, I promise,” he said, kissing his brother again because he could.    
  
“Kazu –“ his brother breathed, backing them against the nearest wall, his brother’s arms supporting him. Just then he realized his brother was shaking, his eyes unusually bright. “Kazu, Kazu –“   
  
“ _Shhh,”_ he hushed, taking his brother’s face in between his hands and kissing his brother tenderly. He didn’t know what was happening but he had some idea, especially with the way his brother was holding him, tight like he was so afraid he’d disappear if he as much as loosen his hold around him. “shhh, it’s okay… we’re okay now, Ni-chan. Don’t worry about it,”   
  
His brother pulled his face down till their foreheads touched, his chest tight at the sight of his brother’s tears dampening his face.    
  
“I thought I was going to lose you,” his brother said, voice shaking along with the rest of him that he couldn’t bear to watch it, couldn’t bear the pain he was seeing on his brother’s face, then, “and if I did – if that bastard did do something to hurt you… God, it was all my fault. That happened because I _couldn’t_ – because I _didn’t_ – _don’t_ know how to stop myself when it comes to you. Because I don’t know how to be a good brother, don’t know how to keep you safe from other people who want to do bad things to you when the only person I should save you from is _me_.  I just. God, I love you so much, you know? I love you more than my own fucking self, more than our parents, more than my own life, Kazu –“   
  
“Ni-chan –“   
  
“But what happened earlier made me realize so many things. I want you for myself, but I – it’s not right and I - I can’t lose you that way, Kazu,” his brother sobbed, miserable, “I can’t, I refuse to, but I’m certain this isn’t going to end here so maybe we should – maybe I should send you home, to our parents, because I can’t – I’m only going to ruin you, your life if we stay together, I’m only going to end up –“   
  
“Ni-chan, what the hell are you -“   
  
His brother caught his mouth into a kiss, swallowing everything he wanted to say, kissing him through his tears.    
  
“I love you so much,” his brother breathed, backing them away from the wall, his jaw set and said nothing anymore as he started walking the rest of the way inside only by memory because he wouldn’t let his brother go, wouldn’t even allow him a moment to breathe, kissing his brother desperately. 


	10. Chapter 10

  
He should have thought about this long ago, should have decided on it the first time the thought came to mind but because he was too stupid to even think of giving something up he thought he’d have forever despite knowing that having _it_ was wrong from the very beginning, he simply tucked the thought at the deepest corner of his mind until he’d almost forgotten it.    
  
Or at least pretended to have forgotten it, until now.    
  
What happened earlier simply proved that no secret was bound to remain hidden forever. He knew this – had known it for so long now but he was too consumed with his need, his desire for his brother to even consider stopping. It had not even once that they were almost caught by their own family members, afterall, but they managed to get away from it all, had managed to even move out from home and live on their own where they could fuck whenever they wanted to and frankly, that was probably where it all started to go wrong.   
  
Their damn carelessness coupled with their combined stupidity was what made it worse. He couldn’t help but wonder how in hell they were able to walk out of that situation they were in earlier, how lucky they both were that his brother’s coach had been so easy to convince despite the fact that he had all the means to keep the two of them there however long he wanted to.    
  
It was probably just pure luck that the older man was too damn horny to think straight that it was way easier to convince him to go along with a child’s plan despite the fact that he had all the capacity and the advantage to make them do what he wanted with them.    
  
But now, as he thought about it hard, he was sure that if the same thing happen in the future, they wouldn’t be so lucky as they’d been today. It would be impossible.   
  
“ _N-Ni-chan_ –“ Kazu moaned, arms tight around his neck as he mouthed his way from his brother’s jaw up to the underside of his ear before moving his mouth further to catch his brother’s own for a kiss – deep and hard and filthy – arms branded around his brother’s waist tight enough to hurt but he couldn’t be bothered to remind himself to be gentle, not when there’s a different kind of urgency thrumming under his skin that he couldn’t quite ignore.   
  
“I’m sorry, Kazu,” he whispered when their mouths parted, “I’m _so_ sorry,” he repeated, and then immediately diving back in for another kiss at the sight of his brother’s bruised lips. He helped himself for a few more kisses, moaning back when his brother did the same, swallowing the sounds escaping the back of his brother’s throat.    
  
When the need was a little bearable, he pulled away, gaze on his brother’s face and watched the way his brother’s eyes are slow to open up, the way the corners of his mouth turned up just the slightest bit when their gazes meet.   
  
He could feel his chest constricting when his brother gave him a smile, the one that turned his eyes into little, adorable slits, the one that made him look so much younger than his age; he couldn’t help the rush of affection washing over him when his brother tilted his head at him, his brother’s small fingers warm and familiar against his shoulders.    
  
“Ni-chan, what’s wrong?” his brother asked, his voice a mere whisper and he let one of his hands travel up to cup the back of his brother’s head to keep him in place as he willed the words to come, tugging his brother’s head down and resting their foreheads together, simply breathing his brother in.   
  
“Nothing,” he whispered, pain twisting in his chest in a way that was so similar to that time he had decided to move out, alone, knowing that this time, he had decided to do the same and he was going to stick to it.    
  
He had to, he knew that now, was sure that he would never forget the genuine fear he saw on his brother’s face the moment his coach aimed that gun at them earlier, wouldn’t ever forget the way his brother’s body shook against him then and for the life of him, he promised that would be the last time he would put his brother’s life at risk.    
  
He had acted like he wouldn’t ever in other similar circumstances – letting someone, anyone, have his way – sexually, at least – on his brother, the way he allowed his brother’s coach earlier. But it was that or suffer the consequences of watching that bastard either hurt him or his brother. He couldn’t – he wouldn’t, not ever, not again.   
  
And he knew exactly what had to be done to accomplish it.   
  
“Everything’s going to be fine from now on,” he breathed into his brother’s mouth, angling his head just the slightest bit so he could kiss his brother properly, pulling back and away just far enough to follow, “I promise you that, Kazu,” before he was kissing him again.   
  
  
+   
  
He snapped his hips hard enough to rattle the bed beneath them, hard enough to make his brother’s weight shift beneath him, quickly moving his arms around his brother’s waist to keep his brother from stumbling face-first into the mattress.    
  
He was groaning, moaning hard as he pounded into the heat of his brother’s body, keeping his brother there and ignoring his brother’s breathless pleas as he fucked his brother from behind over and over.   
  
“Oh Ni-chan, so _good_ , so good  - ah!” his brother mewled the moment he changed the angle of his thrusts, his brother’s small fingers finding his own and gripping them hard enough to leave bruises. “ah, yes! Please, please, I’m so close –“ his brother wailed, the sound making his breath catch, his chest tight as he continued rolling his hips in counter to the  bucks of his brother’s own into him.   
  
“Ni-chan, oh _Ni-chan_ –“ his brother chanted, could feel his brother’s body shuddering against his hold; he watched the way the skin of his brother’s back rippled through his every touch, unblinking, trying to commit every little thing to memory as he held on to his brother, heart twisting painfully inside his ribcage.   
  
“Kazu, Kazu –“ he breathed his brother’s name softly, so different from the way his hips was moving as he fucked his brother harder and harder still, his vision going out of focus every goddamn time his brother would clench his muscles around his aching cock shoved deep into his brother’s body.   
  
“I love you, I love you, I love you so much –“ he breathed, stamping each buck of  his hips with words he knew he wouldn’t be able to say again after this, fingernails digging almost painfully into the soft skin of his brother’s hips.    
  
He was so close he could almost taste it, and even though he wanted to prolong it he knew that he couldn’t. He was sobbing quietly before he could stop himself, eyes wide as he watched his brother’s back, as he listened to the sounds of his brother wails as his brother’s body convulsed inside his arms as if on cue. But even then, he didn’t stop, hips pushing furiously into his brother, twice as hard and twice as fast, wanting nothing but to catch the tail of his brother’s orgasm as his tears – damp and warm – fell down his cheek and into the skin of his brother’s back, his heart breaking despite the orgasm brewing around his middle.   
  
“I’m coming, Kazu – ah!” he screamed, didn’t bother muffling it as he pounded his brother hard to ride the pleasure, sobbing quietly as he held on to his brother’s back like a lifeline, shaking, arms branding around his brother’s waist, just feeling the solidity of him and breathing him in.   
  
It was the last time he was going to hold his brother so close like this, afterall.


	11. Chapter 11

  
He woke up with sore hips and back (as usual), dressed (not the usual) and cold because he was alone in bed and not wrapped claustrophobically tight inside his brother’s embrace.   
  
“N-Ni-chan?” he called, voice still raspy with sleep; he shifted into his side and breathed in the scent his brother left on the sheets, remembering the way he’d been fucked almost senseless into the mattress the night before.    
  
He could feel his cock stir in response at  the memory, the way his brother had refused to fuck him again after that honestly explosive one though his brother did suck him off two more times after it. He couldn’t even remember the last time he came so many times in one night, falling asleep in exhaustion after the fourth (or was it the fifth?) time he came inside his brother’s mouth.   
  
Cupping his half-hard cock in his hand, he called for his brother again, louder this time, but heard nothing but the eerie silence enveloping the whole apartment.    
  
He didn’t know why but there was something clicking into place the moment he carefully hopped off the  bed and into the bathroom where he wished he would find his brother, his heart in his throat when he bypassed the living room in favor of going straight to the kitchen.    
  
Nothing. He went back to the bedroom in search for his phone, before he was walking towards the dresser to grab himself new pair of shirt and pants and drop his phone to the floor the moment he realized that half of the drawer’s contents were gone.   
  
He was shaking by the time he stooped low to retrieve his phone, plastering it against his ear and listening to the operator informing him that the number he had dialed was no longer in use, sliding to the floor, shaking.   
  
  
+   
  
Not even an hour later, his mother arrived with his sister, looking worse for wear and wearing twin looks of worry as they fuss over Kazu, their mother mumbling something about regretting the day she let her sons live on their own knowing that they couldn’t.    
  
He was too numb to speak much more think that he didn’t realize the oddness of it all until his mother and sister have teamed up to pack his belongings in record time before he was asked if he could dress himself.   
  
“Huh?”   
  
“Good gracious, is the fight that bad for you to be so out of it?” his mother grunted, already grabbing for the hem of his shirt with all the intention of taking it off of him. The shirt was halfway up his chest when he realized it was stuck there, and his mother was making choking noises from the back of her throat as she stared at the purplish, reddish marks left on his skin.     
  
He was suddenly brought back to his senses and was tugging at his shirt furiously, but it was too late. His mother already saw it.   
  
“Oh god, oh my god, what the hell are those?!”   
  
+   
  
  
“Tell me what in hell happened, Kazunari, or I swear to god, we’re not leaving this place until your brother shows up so I can beat him to a pulp for hurting you,” his mother threatened him, her voice wavering despite the anger in her eyes. It was the first time he saw her looking so determined to beat the living shit out of anyone, even if that someone happened to be none other than her very own son.   
  
He refused to open his mouth even though he knew he should explain, the sick feeling that he’d been abandoned quite literally by his brother was making it even difficult for him to care what his mother and sister thought about the bruises (but they’re hickeys, his brain pointed out) he had all over his body.    
  
It should worry him but to be honest, he couldn’t give a flying fuck about what his family was thinking right now, not when his mind was otherwise occupied and there was that familiar pain throbbing away in his chest that not even his mother’s embrace could heal.   
  
“Kazunari, I am talking to you!” he vaguely heard her screams through his own blood pounding through his ears, curling onto himself and shaking his head as tears streamed down his cheeks.   
  
  
+   
  
When he came to, he realized he was back on the bed lying on his side, his mother sitting on a chair next to it.    
  
“Are you going to tell me now what in hell happened or do you want me to figure it out for myself, Kazunari?” she said, voice low but careful and for the nth time since this thing started, he wished his brother was here to answer for him, for them.    
  
To say that he was scared was an understatement, most especially at the fact that their mother was looking at him with something so fierce in her eyes, something he couldn’t bear to tell her straight to her face even though he was sure she had already guessed it.   
  
He turned to his other side, his back facing her. He couldn’t even will the tears to stop, couldn’t find the strength to face their mother’s wrath knowing that he was going to do it alone.   
  
“N-Ni-chan,” he found himself whispering miserably under his breath, shoving his fist belatedly into his mouth to muffle it as his whole body shook with emotion he could hardly suppress.    
  
His mother’s hand on his shoulder surprised him, so was her gentle voice when she called his name. “Kazu, come on, turn around, let me see you,” she said, her touch soft and coaxing. “come on, don’t be afraid. I won’t get angry anymore, come on,” he didn’t, he couldn’t, shaking even more as her hand came up to touch his nape, her fingers threading softly through his hair.    
  
“I – I know that those aren’t bruises,” she started and he froze, and it was probably because she knew she couldn’t convince him to talk otherwise. “You and your brother –“   
  
“I’m s-sorry –“ he whimpered, shakily, turning back to face her before she could continue. There was no point on denying the truth, but for all its worth, he would do everything in his power to spare his brother the blame knowing that it’s where this was heading. “but it’s not Ni-chan’s fault. He – I –“   
  
“ – aren’t really blood-related but still, doing this, having this kind of relationship, it’s not –“ she paused at the same time he was whipping around to face her, his eyes wide in shock.   
  
“W-What – w-what did you just say?”


	12. Chapter 12

  
He hadn’t meant to leave as soon as he was sure his brother was asleep but he couldn’t bear the thought of staying there either. He sent a quick message to his sister at the same time he locked the door behind him, telling her to please go and check on Kazu because something came up at school that he had to go somewhere for an indefinite period of time to finish it so he needed her to check on their youngest brother while he was gone.   
  
It wasn’t like he was planning on leaving for good because he knew it was impossible. Soon enough he had to go back and show his face to his family, to Kazu, but figured he could just cross the bridge when he got there. For now, he had to get as far away from Kazu as possible, think things through and decide and what to do from here on.   
  
“Hey,” a voice from behind him prompted him out of his reverie. It was his friend, Machin. He acknowledged the other guy’s presence with a nod of his head before he took his gaze back into the space before him. “you sure you don’t want to tell me what’s wrong, man?” Machin asked, “Seriously, if you’re in some kind of trouble, all you have to do is tell me.”   
  
“I’m fine,” he said.   
  
“Well, forgive me for saying this but you seriously don’t look fine,” Machin said. He shrugged. There was no way he could tell his friend what was bothering him, after all, and even if he could, he wouldn’t. Everything about the trouble he was in was complicated and he didn’t want to complicate it further by opening his mouth and telling other people about it.    
  
“Don’t worry about me,” he said, briefly glancing to  his right where Machin had opted on sitting. “I just need a couple of days to sort my shit out and I swear I’ll be out of your hair. Just a couple of days, I promise.”   
  
“I’m not worried about that, you moron,” Machin said, frowning; he realized Machin had his phone in his hand, twirling it around his palm absently. “you know you can stay here however long you want.”   
  
“Thanks.”   
  
“So you really don’t want to tell me what’s going on?” Machin asked, at the same time Machin’s phone started ringing. “And why, eversince you came here, I have received about a hundred calls from your brother aside from maybe over fifty texts asking me about you?”   
  
He felt that familiar tug in his chest hearing that. “Ignore it.”   
  
“Your mom called too,” Machin said. “five times. This one’s her again. Shall I ignore her too?”   
  
He was honestly surprised but he tried his hardest not to let it show. “You answered before?”   
  
“Yes, but only because I didn’t know it was her,” Machin said, a touched defensive. “she said to tell you to stop being stubborn and come home.”   
  
“Home where?”   
  
“Beats me,” Machin said with a shrug. “though she said something about her and your sister leaving tonight to take the last train, and to tell you that if you want the cat to starve and die, then don’t go home. Didn’t know you own a cat, though,”   
  
He was up on his feet in record-breaking time, sputtering in his haste to grab the still ringing phone out of Machin’s hand.    
  
“Hello?! K-Kaa-chan, what –“ he trailed, pursing his lips as he listened to his mother’s voice on the other end of the line.    
  
“Yes, yes I understand,” he said, lowering his eyes to the ground. He still wasn’t sure what just happened, but it seemed like he only need to go back to know what it was. He hung up and turned to Machin, handing his phone over. “I – I have to go.”   
  
“Right,” Machin said. “want me to drive you to the station?”   
  
He shook his head. “It’s fine, Machin. Thank you.”   
  
Machin gave him this look that said he didn’t understand one bit about what was happening but that he knew he shouldn’t ask. “Don’t mention it, man. Take care on your way home, yeah?”   
  
He nodded, thumping his best friend on the back, gratefully. “I’m going. Thanks again.” He was running to grab his bag before he could stop himself, heart thudding hard in his chest.    
  
  
+   
  
Under an hour later, he was standing by the front door of their apartment, fingers shaking around the key. He wasn’t sure if he did the right thing coming back here, but he guessed there was no turning back now. He inserted the key after heaving a deep, calming breath, hearing the lock click and turning the knob, shoving the door wide open.   
  
He hadn’t even managed two steps inside, hadn’t even closed the door properly behind him when his brother’s skinny figure was there to welcome him, slamming him back to the door and kissing him.


	13. Chapter 13

In a space of a heartbeat, he found himself backed against the doorframe, his mouth locked against his brother’s own for a hungry kiss. Kazu moaned into his mouth, his skinny legs tangled around his waist. He had his arms under Kazu’s hips for support, moaning as Kazu sucked on his tongue eagerly.   
  
“Ni-chan, Ni-chan,” Kazu chanted when they pull apart to breathe, and if the hungry noises his brother was making weren’t enough to make him hard in record-breaking time, then Kazu rolling his hips against him surely would.   
  
But despite that, despite the fact that he, too, was turned on to the point of pain, he had to pull away, resting his forehead against his brother’s own chuckling at the frustrated sounds Kazu was making when he did so.   
  
“Let me breathe,” he said, meaning it as a joke even though nothing about this was funny to begin with. Especially when he raised his head, opened his eyes and found that Kazu’s eyes were brimming with silent tears.   
  
“Oh God –“   
  
“You _left_ ,” Kazu breathed, shaking against him, fingers tight around his shoulders. “again. Why do you always do that, Ni-chan? Why do you keep on leaving me behind? Why, why I don’t –“   
  
He leaned up and kissed his brother’s mouth to stop him, meaning it to be soft, chaste, but the kiss still ended up hungry and needy because his brother had his mouth parted ready for him, just like always.    
  
It hadn’t even been a day and the hunger throbbing away in his chest was so powerful he found it difficult to breathe through it and it didn’t help that his brother was curled tight around him like this.    
  
“I was doing it for you,” he whispered still mostly against his brother’s mouth when he pulled away just far enough to talk, “I was prepared to leave just so you wouldn’t have to go through the same horrible thing, the one that happened to us yesterday but just one phone call and I’m here. Not even a day after and I come running back when I heard what happened to you.”   
  
He tilted his brother’s chin up with one hand, his other still curled around his brother’s hip protectively. “But you seem okay,” he said, his brain finally catching up with him. “you are, aren’t you?”   
  
“Yes.” Was his brother’s simple answer.    
  
“Then why did Kaa-chan –“   
  
“Because she knows,” Kazu said, cutting him off. He swore the way his eyes widened in surprise hearing that was both hilarious and terrifying. “and because I told her she should convince you to come back or I will starve myself to death.”   
  
“Oh my god, you’re not seriously telling me –“   
  
“Did you know I am adopted?” Kazu asked in a tiny voice at the same time he wriggled himself free from his hold. He let him, only because he was too stunned to do anything else. Kazu stepped away, just barely, and he found himself dreading the short distance separating them.    
  
“Did you, Ni-chan?” Kazu asked.    
  
“Yes.” He admitted. Kazu swayed on his feet, and he was automatically reaching over to give his brother a hand to steady him.    
  
“So why do you still insist on leaving me?!” Kazu half-yelled and it took every ounce of his willpower not to tug Kazu into his arms and hug him. “I thought all along that the reason you are trying to do the right thing by leaving me is because you know _this_ , what we have between us is morally wrong but it’s not! We’re not blood-related! We’re not –“   
  
“You are our parents’ son as much as I am, Kazunari,” he cut in, reaching out to press a hand against his brother’s cheek, hoping it was enough to calm him. “you are my brother and I am yours and it has been that way ever since our parents signed the papers and brought you home with them. I loved you ever since that day Kaa-chan asked me to hold you, have fallen in love with you the second you smiled at me from the blanket you’re wrapped around in and I’ve loved you every day since, Kazu. As your older brother, it is expected that I do. But to love you more than a brother should, more than I honestly do, is wrong.”   
  
“But we’re not –“   
  
“The papers say we are, Kazu,” he said.    
  
“Then let’s do something to change it,” Kazu said, pushing himself closer to him and curling himself around him he had no choice but to put his arms around his brother. “denounce me from the family, I don’t care. I really don’t. My name doesn’t mean a thing if I can’t be with you, Ni-chan.”   
  
“Kazu –“   
  
“I’m serious,” Kazu said, breathing the words against the front of his chest, fingers curled tight against the fabric of his shirt. “leave me again and that’s the last time you’ll see me alive. My life means nothing if I’m not with you.”   
  
“Kazunari, you know that’s not –“   
  
“I told Kaa-chan that too,” Kazu said, and he wasn’t sure if that admission was what made him tug on his brother so he could hug him tighter. “she didn’t say anything except ‘I knew this was going to happen anyway’, and told Nee-chan they’re going home.”   
  
“Our mother is scary,” he said, wondering if he should properly go and thank her, even though the embarrassment alone was enough to make him think otherwise.    
  
“She’s not,” Kazu said. “she understands, and that’s – I guess that’s the most wonderful thing about her, really. She doesn’t judge us, even though she has all the right to.”   
  
  
He squeezed his brother tight, his chest unusually tight but he knew it didn’t have anything to do with pain anymore. “Still, doing this behind their backs is wrong. I – we should apologize.”   
  
“We should.”   
  
He pulled away, but not completely. Just far enough to look his brother in the eyes, but still close enough to breathe him in. “Today?” he asked.    
  
Kazu shook his head. “Maybe tomorrow.”   
  
He smiled. “You have other plans today?”   
  
Kazu smiled back, and it was the kind that made things in his belly tight. Kazu ran his fingers up his bare arms and settled them against the  nape of his neck, holding on, feeling him.   
  
“Bedroom plans. For you and me.”   
  
He smiled and let himself be pulled, his mouth meeting Kazu’s. “Sounds like a good one, then?”   
  
Kazu smiled. “Oh, totally,” Kazu agreed, nipping his lower lip. “so, let’s go?”   
  
He had his arms wrapped around his brother’s hips, heaving him up like he was nothing in the same breath.    
  
“Let’s.” 


	14. Chapter 14

  
It wasn’t supposed to be this easy, none of it was to begin with, but somehow, despite his reluctance to believe this was really happening, there was no mistaking that it did. With the fact that his family had somehow ‘approved’ of his and his brother’s relationship despite the wrongness of it all made it even harder to wrap his head around everything but he had to, he should. After all, who else would understand the fact that he and his ‘adopted’ brother loved each other this way aside from their family who had been there for them, with them, watching them gravitate toward each other like two pieces of a puzzle eversince they were children?  
  
It was an inevitable thing their mother had probably foreseen way before and he guessed it was safe enough to assume that no matter what happened, he and his brother – _his_ Kazu – would have their family’s support to back them up wherever they end up in from here on.   
  
“Kiss me,” Kazu moaned into his cheek, tongue swiping wetly against his skin. He shivered at the feel of it, leaning up to give in to Kazu’s request as he navigate his way inside their  shared bedroom by memory alone, Kazu clinging to him like he couldn’t bear the thought of letting go. Kazu’s tongue soon found his, sucking his eagerly and making the prettiest noises as he was doing so.   
  
They reach the bed in minutes, placing his brother’s skinny form down as gently as he could manage it with their mouths still locked; his brother moaned his refusal when he tried to pull away, chuckling softly into the kiss as he tried to detach his brother’s arms and legs still wrapped tightly around him.   
  
“You have to let go, Kazu,” he whispered, rubbing his nose against his brother’s own and getting a sort of annoyed huff in return for it. “seriously. How do you expect me to do this properly if you won’t free me?”  
  
Kazu was silent for a moment before he answered, voice tinged with remembered pain. “I’m scared that if I do, you’d run.”  
  
The momentary ache was shocking, at the same time, heartbreaking, he found himself dropping his weight instinctively over Kazu’s body and wrapping his arms around Kazu in a way that was probably suffocating but Kazu sure looked like he didn’t mind. For a long while there they just held each other, his face mashed against the side of Kazu’s neck, waiting for Kazu’s trembling to subside before he slowly pulled away.  
  
“I’m _so_ sorry,” he said, thumbing the side of his brother’s damp eyes and feeling his chest constricting at the sight of him. It was probably difficult for other people to understand the extent of his and Kazu’s feelings, what they felt for each other and maybe, they don’t have to make them. So long as they’re together, things would be okay.  
  
“I promise I never will again,” he said, thumbing the corners of Kazu’s lips, the mole on his chin, watching the way Kazu’s mouth quiver as Kazu strained to keep his eyes open, watching him.   
  
“But if you have to –“  
  
“I’ll take you with me,” he cut in, cupping Kazu’s chin in his hand and ducking down for a kiss. “I won’t leave you behind, Kazu. Never again, I promise.”  
  
“Ni-chan –“  
  
He smiled. “Don’t you think it’s high time you call me Satoshi instead?” he teased, and he swore the smile he got in return made every little pain he suffered because of this forbidden love for his brother worth it.   
  
“ _Satoshi_ ,” Kazu breathed, saying his name in that soft, soft way that made him feel like it was Kazu’s tongue caressing his most private parts, repeating it and making him instantly hard despite himself. “Satoshi,”  
  
“Yes,” he said. He leaned down for another kiss, tasting hope and love and so many other things beneath his tongue when Kazu met him halfway.  
  
  
+  
  
They each took their time divesting each other’s clothes in between unhurried kisses, laughing and giggling the way they normally wouldn’t before. Maybe it was the knowledge that they were free to love each other this way that made them savor this moment, but either way, he liked it. He liked it very much.  
  
“God, I’m so sorry,” he found himself muttering at the sight of these red-purplish patches marring Kazu’s skin, his palm curled around Kazu’s hip possessively. He raised his head in time to catch Kazu shaking his head in answer, of Kazu reaching down to cup the back of his neck and tugging him up.   
  
“You’re welcome to put more of them on me if you’re up to it,” Kazu said, smiling encouragingly, lovingly, that had him ducking down to kiss him in utter gratefulness. He’s so happy he could burst, kissing Kazu thoroughly before pulling away.   
  
“Not this time, no,” he said, touching the corner of Kazu’s mouth with the tips of his finger before he was reaching down to take Kazu in hand, the familiar weight of his brother’s cock inside his palm making his throat dry. He squeezed the base and thumbed at the head tenderly, hearing Kazu whimper in response and it was the sweetest sound ever; like a healing balm to his previously broken heart, it felt like. “this time, we are going to take it slow. Slow, Kazu. No rush. Let me love you the way I should have, the way I’m supposed to.”  
  
 _“Ni_ – S-Satoshi –“  
  
He smiled and started kissing his way down Kazu’s body, from his neck to his collarbones, to his chest; paying extra attention to Kazu’s nipples and enjoying the way they hardened beneath his tongue. Kazu’s fingers dig into his scalp, encouraging him with soft noises coming from the back of Kazu’s throat as Kazu parted his legs wider to accommodate him.   
  
He was still pumping Kazu’s hard-on as he licked his way downwards, his exploration taking him further down to Kazu’s navel; soon he was licking Kazu’s bellybutton wetly, Kazu writhing and moaning beneath him on the bed as he kept up with the rhthym of his fingers around Kazu’s cock, slow and sure.   
  
“Oh _god_ , oh _please_ , S-Satoshi, I  need –“  
  
“ _Shhh_ ,” he hushed, mouth watering at the flush marring Kazu’s chest, of his bruised lips and heavy-lidded eyes. There was so much he wanted to do but he knew he didn’t have to rush. Kazu was here, they were together, and that was all that mattered.   
  
“I want _you_ , oh god _, please_ , I want you –“  
  
He chuckled, pumped the base once, twice, the gesture was more of a tease than anything before he was sinking his mouth over the head, tasting salt and skin and arousal as he rolled his tongue over the dripping slit. Kazu’s hips surged from the bed, moaning, fingers tight on his hair as he hummed around his mouthful. Kazu keened, breathy and husky, hips stuttering into him; the only thing he could do was let it happen, bracing himself there on the bed on his elbow, mouth parted wide as Kazu’s cock slipped in and out of his lips willingly.  
  
“I’m going to – oh _god_ , I’m going to –“  
  
He hummed, gripped Kazu’s hips with his other free hand and hollowed his cheeks, closed his eyes, chest heaving at the sound of Kazu’s screams when he came.   
  
  
+  
  
When Kazu’s trembling subsided, he crawled back up, mouth still tingling with the aftertaste of Kazu’s pleasure beneath his tongue. There was no other way to describe it, he was addicted to the taste of his brother’s pleasure, Kazu was too, he was sure of it and that was why they were a match, through and through.   
  
“You’re perfect and I love you,” he mumbled, nosing Kazu’s cheek. Kazu chuckled in return, obviously too sated to come up with anything better to say. He didn’t need him to anyway, content with just lying there listening to Kazu’s breathing.   
  
A few minutes later, Kazu squirmed and he felt his questing hands feeling him up. “It’s your turn now,” Kazu said, urging him to move, to settle himself above Kazu. “come on, Satoshi.”   
  
He giggled, couldn’t not, and he received a light slap in the butt for it. “It’s cute when you call me with my first name,” he told Kazu, kissing him once, twice, because he could. “and hot. It makes me want to fuck you hard, and slow, until you’re begging for it.” he said, mouthing the words into Kazu’s neck as Kazu rearranged himself beneath him, one hand finding their familiar supplies stocked beneath the pillows.   
  
“Then what are you waiting for there?” Kazu hummed, handing him the half-empty tube of lube and dragging his fingers along his side encouragingly. “ _Fuck_ me, come on.”  
  
“I will.”  
  
+  
  
There wasn’t much to this he hadn’t seen already,  but still, it didn’t stop him from watching every little changes on Kazu’s face the second he slipped a second finger alongside the first that was already there, inside Kazu’s body, and enjoying the way Kazu’s muscle clamp tightly around his fingers as if on cue. He was still so tight, so hot, that he could already imagine sinking his cock into that perfect heat and staying there for as long as he could.   
  
“I’m good, _God_ –“ Kazu whined, tugging him by his elbow and whining some more when he didn’t budge. He added another one and Kazu outright wailed, the raw sound of his voice was like a direct punch to the gut he found himself cupping his own cock, surprised at the way it throbbed painfully inside his palm.   
  
“Kazu, oh _fuck_ –“  
  
“Yes, _come_ on. Please, I _need_ you, Satoshi,” Kazu groaned, trashing his head back at the same time he pulled all of his fingers out of Kazu’s ass and lined himself over Kazu, his cock in his hand. “God, please,  fuck me now. Come on!”  
  
He groaned, dipped his head down for another kiss, wet and filthy, and drove himself home with a groan.  
  
  
+  
  
He was going to come so hard, he could feel it, spine tingling with the need to shove himself deeper into Kazu’s body as he stared at Kazu’s face. “Fuck, ah _fuck!”_  
  
“Yes! _There_ , oh god _, there!”_  
  
He groaned, keeping his eyes open despite the urge to close them, wanting to see everything from here on. Kazu’s pupils were blown wide, his chest heaving hard, his ankles bent and resting against his thighs as he fucked into Kazu’s ass time and time again, his cock hard and throbbing. He kept going at it, at the angle he found hitting Kazu’s prostate, mouth dry, fingers blindly finding Kazu’s cock which was completely hard again.   
  
“Come with _me,”_ he groaned, letting go of Kazu’s legs and letting him wrap them around his waist as he pumped his hips fast, faster and faster still. The bed was creaking beneath them, their bodies matted with sweat but neither of them mind it. “I want you to come with me, Kazu.”  
  
“ _Yes, I will_ , yes oh god, yes.”  
  
He moaned, jerked his hips twice as hard and twice as fast he was sure he was hitting the ends of Kazu’s body, feeling his orgasm build up infinitesimally fast the harder he pumped his hips. He was getting there, and he could feel Kazu’s hand on his own cock slipped, before Kazu was wailing a cry so loud at the same time he felt the telltale feel of Kazu’s warm come against his stomach. Kazu’s inner muscles clamped around his cock like clockwork, and soon he was gripping Kazu’s waist hard enough to leave bruises as a growl of pure pleasure tore itself from the back of his throat, spurting his pleasure inside Kazu’s body with a full body shudder.  
  
  
+  
  
He slid down next to Kazu after a few minutes spent inside Kazu’s body, his cock bathed with his own come. They were still breathing hard after that explosive orgasm but as soon as he was next to Kazu, Kazu was folding his body against him, like he couldn’t bear the thought of moving away.   
  
“Wow, that was –“  
  
“Hmmm,” Kazu hummed sleepily into his chest, fingers finding his own and squeezing them. “one of the best, yes?”  
  
“One of the best.” He agreed.  
  
“Better than last night, I suppose?”  
  
He giggled, the pain of the other night completely forgotten. “They said break up sex was always the best. I don’t think I want to agree, but –“  
  
“Sex with you is always wonderful, Ni-chan.”  
  
“Satoshi.” He reminded Kazu. Kazu smiled and scooted closer that not even air could pass between them. “It’s Satoshi now, don’t forget.”  
  
“Fine,” Kazu agreed, and he gasped at the feel of Kazu’s tongue against his neck, warm and hot; the rush of heat was immediate he wondered briefly if there would come a time he wouldn’t feel like this for Kazu but he figured that was only possible when he was old and couldn’t get it up any longer.   
  
He’d want Kazu even when he was old and graying, now and then, always. Even if he wasn’t supposed to, even when wanting him was forbidden.  
  
“I love you, Kazu.”  
  
Kazu smiled against him as he gathered him in. “I love you too, Ni-chan.”  
 


End file.
